I don't take it lightly when a family trusts us with their story, and when these two mums reached out, I knew I wanted to share it. Because I think every parent who has ever felt fear, or grief, or that desperate need to do something in the face of the uncontrollable, needs to hear what they did.
Joolz and Britt chose to carry their babies together. Baby Jonnie was due first.
Jonnie arrived earthside healthy but devastatingly two days later he was gone. Sudden neonatal death, with no clear reason and an investigation that was still ongoing months later. At the same time, they are still carrying our baby Arthur.
They described it as carrying both love and loss, side by side, and I haven't been able to get that out of my head since they shared it with me.
Choosing to show up
These are first-time mums who had already been through the worst thing a parent can go through and in the middle of all of that unimaginable grief, they decided to come to us. They completed our Baby + Child First Aid course while Arthur was still being carried and while the grief for Jonnie was still so raw, because as they said themselves, “trauma changes you”.
“It makes you want to walk into what's next stronger, more aware, more prepared. We wanted to be able to pick up any early warning signs that had, heaven forbid, been missed.”
They wanted to know that if something felt off with Arthur, they would recognise it and know exactly what to do. As first-time mums who had already lived through the unimaginable, that felt less like a choice and more like something they had to do.
I can’t explain how grateful I am that they chose to be educated with us.
What the course gave them
They were honest that the course didn't take the fear away. First aid education was never a promise that nothing bad will happen. What it does is make sure that if something does, you are not frozen, you are not starting from nothing, you know what to do and you do it. They called it grounding, and I think that word is exactly right. For two mums preparing to bring Arthur into the world after everything they had already been through, that reassurance was everything.
If you're looking for that same grounding, our Baby & Child First Aid Course is available online, in-person across Australia, or at your home.
Why I do this work
This is the reason Tiny Hearts exists. Not just for the close calls, and not just for the parents who come to us wanting to feel a little more prepared before their baby arrives, although all of that matters enormously to me. It's also for the families who come to us carrying something much heavier, and choose to show up anyway, because those parents remind me that this work is bigger than a course.
I always say it is parents who save lives, not paramedics. As parents, we are the most powerful responders in a child’s life. In an emergency, we can help our little ones faster than anyone else.
These two mums understood that in a way that most of us, thankfully, will never have to, and they chose to do something with that understanding.
They said it better than I ever could: "This is how we honour our boys by loving bravely, and preparing wisely."
To Joolz and Britt, thank you for trusting Tiny Hearts with Jonnie and Arthur's story. Thank you for showing up when showing up must have been one of the hardest things you had ever done. We are so honoured to have been part of your journey 💙💙
For Jonnie xx
To follow along with Joolz, Britt and Arthur's journey:
@the.twomamas
